Thursday, January 12, 2012

Well, That's Disappointing!

So, the Department of Homeland Security is in hot water again. They've announced that they're monitoring social media and blogs for information important to national security. They're monitoring Facebook, Twitter, MySpace, Youtube, Drudge Report, and even ABC News.

Here's a copy of the list of the sites and social media they're eyeballing.

My question is, what the fuck do I have to do to get on this list?!?

That's only partially tongue in cheek. I go through spasms and fits every now and then because I feel I should be doing more than writing horror and weird fiction, fart jokes, and the occasional recounting of my own shameful idiocy.

I sometimes feel I should be making a statement, or trying to do something more worthwhile - more meaningful - with my writing. That's why, every now and then, you have to deal with blog posts about my political beliefs. Or my deep and abiding hatred for the kabuki theater puppet show that is Homeland Security and the TSA's unreasonable, suspect, and illegal searching and molestation of American citizens under the guise of security.

So, to say I'm disappointed that I didn't make the list is entirely true. I'm obviously not making enough noise (as I'm allowed to as a US citizen afforded all of his rights under the 1st Amendment). If I'm not making any lists, if my writing is not even hitting the radar of the government watchdogs, I'm not trying hard enough, and that's where my quandary is.

I want to make a difference. I want to rock the boat. I want to question authority.

I'm apparently not doing it well enough.

So, I'll get back to scatalogical humor and reviews of horror movies soon. I promise. But understand that I may also be occasionally spouting off like a radical, subversive, pinko-commie, Socialist, jihadist now and again... just to make some analyst, in the windowless basement of some nondescript government building somewhere, have to wade through transcripts of my blog.

Yep! I'm that kind of a dick.

So, in that vein, today's blog was brought to you by the following sponsors (who are guaranteed to make the NSA's Echelon computers lose their minds and make DHS' geeks wet themselves!):
* Global Terrorism
* Domestic Terrorism
* Jyhad (Remember the awesome collectible card game that started out as Jyhad and became Vampire: The Masquerade? I LOVED that game!)
* The unsecured Mexican border
* The Occupy Wall Street protests
* Ron Paul
* Whoever the CIA dude was who shot JFK from the grassy knoll
* Political Assassination
* The Second Amendment, Guns, Firearms
* The Illuminati
* The TSA.
* Barack Obama
* That fat bastard, Hugo Chavez, and his favorite midget, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad
* Wikileaks
* Anonymous
* Homeland Security
Of course. I could be totally wrong. Maybe I don't want the notoriety of being on a government watchlist.

Hmmm... I should have thought this through a little better.

Nevermind what I said.

1 comment:

Chrissy said...

You have issues.